Now we know what the help desk boys and girls have to suffer


Senior member

This has got to be one of the funniest incidents I've heard in a long time.
This guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a true story from
the 'WordPerfect Helpline,' which was transcribed from a recording
monitoring the Customer Care Department. Needless to say, the HelpDesk
employee was fired. However, he is currently suing the WordPerfect
Organisation for 'termination without cause.'

This is the actual dialogue of the former WordPerfect Customer Support
employee. (Now you will know why they record these conversations).

'Rich Hall, computer assistance; how may I help you?'

'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.'

'What sort of trouble?'

'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.'

'Went away?'

'They disappeared.'

'Hmmm. So what does your screen look like now?'



'It's blank.! It won't accept anything when I type.'

'Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?'

'How do I tell?'

'Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?'

'What's a sea-prompt?'

'Never mind can you move your cursor around the screen?'

'There isn't any cursor. I told you it won't accept anything I type.'

'Does your monitor have a power indicator?'

'What's a monitor?'

'It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a
little light that tells you when its on?'

'I don't know.'

'Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord
goes into it. Can you see that?'

'Yes, I think so.'

'Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the

'Yes, it is.'

'When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables
plugged into the back of it, not just one?'

'Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other

'Okay, here it is.'

'Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of
your computer.'

'I can't reach.'

'Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?'


'Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over'

'Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle it's because it's dark.'


'Yes, the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from
the window.'

'Well, turn on the light then.'

'I can't.'

'No? why not?'

'Because there's a power failure.'

'A power..a power failure?..Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still
have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?'

'Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.'

'Good. Go and get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it
was when you! got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from.'

'Really? Is it that bad?'

'Yes, I'm afraid it is.'

'Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?'

'Tell them you're too ******* stupid to own a computer.'
This story actually happened at my previous employer. One of our young ladies was using an accounting programme. She received a prompt which read "press any key". She stared at her key board for a while and then called up the help desk and asked the person manning the desk were is the any key on her keyboard as she could not locate it.