Best Thread Joke of the day

It's reported that The President claims " we are not Greece, we are not Portugal "

I bet it wasn't George W. that told him. That sort of info is top security in the White House.

:)
 
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As a guy takes his seat on an airplane, he is surprised to find a parrot strapped in next to him. After taking off, the flight attendant comes around to serve the passengers on the plane. The guy asks the flight attendant for a coffee and the parrot squawks: "And get ME a coke...NOW!"

The flight attendant, flustered by the parrot's attitude, brings back a coke for the parrot. However, she forgets the coffee for the guy.

As the guy points this out, the parrot drains his glass and screams:

"Get me another coke or I'll really create a scene!"

Quite upset, the attendant comes back shaking, with another coke, but still no coffee.

Irritated at her forgetfulness, the man decides to try the parrot's approach. "I've asked you twice for a coffee. Go and get it right now, or I'll create a scene that will make HIS look like a Victorian tea party!"

The next moment, both the guy and the parrot are grabbed and thrown out of the emergency exit by two burly security guards.

Hurtling towards earth, the parrot turns to him and says: "You're pretty cheeky for a guy who can't fly!"
 
The thief sneaks to the flat. The Parrot yells: "Roger looks on you!" The thief covered the parrot with the blanket. Parrot yells:" I'm not Roger. Roger is a bulldog!"
 
A man went into Waterstones and said to the girl, "Do you have the new self-help book for men with small penises?"

She said, "I don't think it's in yet"

"That's the one..."
 
Top Ten Ways the Bible would be different if it were written by college students.

10. Last Supper would have been eaten the next morning cold.

9. The Ten Commandments are actually only five, double-spaced, and written in a large font.

8. New edition every two years in order to limit reselling.

7. Forbidden fruit would have been eaten because it wasn't cafeteria.

6. Paul's letter to the Romans becomes Paul's e-mail to [email protected].

5. Reason Cain killed Abel: They were roommates and fought over the last joint.

4. The place where the end of the world occurs: Finals, not Armageddon.

3. Out go the mules, in come the mountain bikes.

2. Reason why Moses and followers walked in the desert for 40 years: They didn't want to ask directions and look like freshmen.

1. Instead of God creating the world in six days and resting on the seventh, He would have put it off until the night before it was due and then pulled an all-nighter.

:LOL:
 
drew_peacock.jpg
 
There were three nuns talking and one nun said, "I was cleaning the priest's chamber, and I found some Playboy magazines under his pillow, so I burned them." The nuns looked at each other and the next one said, "That's nothing, I found a box of condoms in his drawer, so I poked little holes in them with a nail." The third nun suddenly jumped out of her seat and said, "Oh my god! I got to go."
 
A dentist is talking to his patient about the sanitary problems some of his fellow dentists were facing. He said that one of his friends was touring a latex glove factory in Mexico, and saw how they make the gloves. One person would stick his hand in the melted latex, walk over to a vat of cooling water, then dip his hand in it to solidify the latex. The glove was then thrown in a finished products box. The dentist's patient was disgusted by the lack of care taken in making the gloves sanitary. Wanting to keep all the patients he could, the dentist didn't mention how they made condoms.
 
A blonde went to eletronic store and she asked, "How is much is this TV?"

The salesman said, "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes."

The next day she came back as a brunette. She asked the salesman how much the TV was. He said, "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes."

The next day she came back as a red head and asked the salesman how much the TV was. He said, "Sorry we don't sell to blondes."

She replied, " I came in here as a brunette and a red head. How do you know I am a blonde?"

"Because that is not a TV, it's a microwave."
 
Gabrial said:
A blonde went to eletronic store and she asked, "How is much is this TV?"

The salesman said, "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes."

The next day she came back as a brunette. She asked the salesman how much the TV was. He said, "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes."

The next day she came back as a red head and asked the salesman how much the TV was. He said, "Sorry we don't sell to blondes."

She replied, " I came in here as a brunette and a red head. How do you know I am a blonde?"

"Because that is not a TV, it's a microwave."
Click to expand...

I like this one(y)
 
Joseff said:
I like this one(y)
Click to expand...


1. Joseff gives a repu to Gabrial
2. Joseff posts another blog to say he likes the joke


I don't get this... :eek:

Doctor doctor - is there something wrong with me? :cheesy:
 
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