"Is there anything else I can help you with?"

[trendie]

Anybody else find this excruciatingly maddening?

You spend god knows how long choosing from a menu of options, then you still have to wait in a queue, the person on the other end of the line is clearly inept, provides vague and non-committal replies, usually implying its your fault for the problem.
They have clearly failed to provide any useful information, then have the audacity to say "Is there anything else I can help you with?".
Well, no, actually.

It's enough for you to "go postal".

 

[trendie]

and another thing....

Why does "get on like a house on fire" mean you get on well.
If my house was on fire, the last thing I would have is empathy for the situation, and would be on the verge of a breakdown from the stress.

 

[timsk]

Anybody else find this excruciatingly maddening?

Yep!
But what's even worse is:
"Is there anything else I can help you with today?"
"Did you enjoy your meal today?"
"Did you find what you were looking for today?"
"Have our staff answered all your questions today?"

Tim.
Fully paid up member of GOGS. (Grumpy Old Git Society)

 

[shadowninja]

Would you like fries with that?

 

[trendie]

"Your call is really important to us.."

(Yeah! esp as I'm calling on some crappy high-rate line.)

 

[trendie]

"We are experiencing unusually high call volumes"

means "we didnt anticipate how crap this product was"
or
"we dont employ enough people to deal with the number of complaints we are receiving"

(have you noticed if you phone up a "sales" line for the same company they answer almost immediately?)

 

[arabianights]

I hate pret a manger in particular for this sort of excessive friendliness

 

[tomorton]

I think you'll find you're a bunch of grumpy old gits.

Anything else I can help you with today?

 

[trader_dante]

"We are experiencing unusually high call volumes"

means "we didnt anticipate how crap this product was"
or
"we dont employ enough people to deal with the number of complaints we are receiving"

(have you noticed if you phone up a "sales" line for the same company they answer almost immediately?)

Here is something else interesting.

Have you ever phoned up a service and they say "If you would be happy to fill in a short questionnaire after this call on the quality of the service (or something along these lines) please press #"

I think BT do it sometimes.

If you press # you get through almost immediately. If you don't press # you continue waiting for however long.

The best play seems to be to say you will do it and then "change your mind" at the end of the call.

 

[scose-no-doubt]

I found that with Sky and Barclays, you get shorter waiting times if you randomly bash buttons and get put through to someone rather than entering your details (phone/card number etc) and confirming you are a customer. Try it.

 

[shadowninja]

Here is something else interesting.

Have you ever phoned up a service and they say "If you would be happy to fill in a short questionnaire after this call on the quality of the service (or something along these lines) please press #"

I think BT do it sometimes.

If you press # you get through almost immediately. If you don't press # you continue waiting for however long.

The best play seems to be to say you will do it and then "change your mind" at the end of the call.

I use exactly the same technique to get free drinks from gay truckers.

 

[Lord Flasheart]

Anybody else find this excruciatingly maddening?

You spend god knows how long choosing from a menu of options, then you still have to wait in a queue, the person on the other end of the line is clearly inept, provides vague and non-committal replies, usually implying its your fault for the problem.
They have clearly failed to provide any useful information, then have the audacity to say "Is there anything else I can help you with?".
Well, no, actually.

It's enough for you to "go postal".

so what actually caused this outburst

 

[trendie]

so what actually caused this outburst

Christmas!

False jollity; we are exhorted to enjoy the festivities, but only by spending our money on their branded versions. (bring on the saturnalia!)

False politeness; the pointless addition of phrases such as the thread heading, being asked "how are you?" when in truth these people are just reading a fricking script.
And the inference they were helpful to begin with!!

Manipulation; the "clever" sales pitch, where, once they give you their speil, they ask "so, when is good to meet, today or tomorrow"; this makes me grind my teeth as it infers I have been taken in by their script, and think the only options are "today" or "tomorrow" (for example) rather than "no thanks, not interested"; the answer which, of course, they are given.

(I think I have a habit of getting to the nub of things, the essence of things, and hate the manipulation, and the using of phrases to imply the exchange has been better than it was.)

 

[Lord Flasheart]

I see what you mean,thankfully I never sold like that

Reverse selling was my speciality, a bit like some of the training schools on here
They make you sit an entrance exam and say you have been specialy selected and once we have your contribution to traning you are off and running.The reality is everyone gets accepted. Its amazing how many grads fall for this. Ive sold It training and cars that way.
Bit of a deviation this but they always make sure nobody gets 100% in a very simple test.The it test had questions like what is the capitol of Australia. At least 90% put sydney down, or the capitol of canada as Toronto, or cap of Brazil as Rio. Be honest guys who got all three right. Until I saw the test I would have quite happily put a lot of money on the capitol of Brazil being Rio. I asked loads of friends this and hardly anyone got all three.The answers are canberra,ottowa, and Brazilia. nothing to do with thread but its xmas

 

[MrGecko]

Manipulation; the "clever" sales pitch, where, once they give you their speil, they ask "so, when is good to meet, today or tomorrow"

This is known as a "presumptive close".

 

[the hare]

Christmas!

Are we still allowed to refer to christmas as christmas ?

I though it was now universally referred to as "the holiday season" or some such nonsense.

 

[scose-no-doubt]

xmas

 

[arabianights]

xmas

is it true the scouse santa nicks the kids' presents?

 

[scose-no-doubt]

what presents?

 

[arabianights]

you know... bb guns, bmw hubcaps, that kinda thing