The End. Tales, ramblings and other stuff from a Full-timer (ex)

Piece of chewing gum stuck a park bench, do you...?


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Sir Pond Life Dreg

Active member
135 125
Tales n sh!T from a eliterate chump...


'Twas five years ago I started trading and quickly jumped into full-time and had a rather wonderful start making more paper than I could imagine.
There were 10k days, 5k days, 000's 10's and of course the odd 10k,5k negative days to match, all of this was a breeze though as I knew I could make any money that I lost back and more besides.

In my time trading I've seen those nasty spreadbetty firms nail my stop, once 150 pips away from market price, 2 brokers make off with my loot after thinking that their monkeys could trade the clients coin, 1000's of forums/twitter/facebookie/real life fantasists disappear after reality had waved it's pork sword in their direction. Just t'other day I was in the gym and met another real life one complete with wife-beater and protein shake who was giving it large and just closing a trade for 5 large on his iphone and saying "nah iz easy bruv not fokin rocket si enz those twatty bankas 'av got it made" whilst up in the gym I noticed that he got into a rather tatty looking Vectra (Y plate) which resembled that smoking meteorite the russkies had blow over the other day. it must have been running on unfiltered cooking oil from the chippy complete with a battered snag stuck in the injectors for full effect!

I've also had a few dirty weekends where I've left open some wild trades which could have quite easily wiped me. when the eu zone was blowing up I had a 25 lotta on and it was 50 pips out of court and at the time I couldn't give a ***c so I left it on and woke up Monday to find i was 5k better off, by the end of the week I was spitting **** as I would have been, assuming I left it open, 110k better off, oh yeah, I finished that week down!
I've been a buyer of equities as they couldn't possibly go any lower, that of course was before they were de-listed. I've missed ***in great moves by hours. I've clicked buy instead of sell numerous times:LOL: always closing out immediately(y) I once fired up a demo account with the same co that I had me real one wiv and opened a 20 conny on crude on the demo, at least that's what I thought, of course it was my real one and I took a $600 for that little mistake:LOL::eek: dumbass!

The forums; omfg hfsb (holy ***in shiitballs) WTF is it with the forums $12 to 50 mil in my lunch break! you dumb carntz you make me feel lyke 'm cleva!
Then of course there is the Jacko's n dare I say Wasp's of the forums who don't mind relieving the good, and if we are honest, gullible people who frequent said forums of their hard earn money.
"Oh yes, I'll trade for you. I consistently make around 30% per month with minimal drawdowns of say 3% and will guarantee your deposit" Yeah ***in right-o. Don't fall for this sh!t chumpz else you will be feeling proppa :cry: gonna be obvious after the event what a dumb muvva you've been innit despite the fact that you've managed to accumulate some serious coin from being a smart mo-fo greed will get ya if ya let it!
My favourite is the monkeys who think they've got it after 2 months and like to shout about it. I hope they can handle what comes next.

Prop firms; Rolled up-to a couple of auditions for prop IDLE and all went well as I baffled 'em with some market knowledge n fired 'em a three month statement of my most profitable periods(y):LOL: One thing that baffled me was during the audition process there were a complete set of new faces there from the first to second stages:eek::idea: To be fair, if I had gone down this route I might still be playing now, as Britney said "My loneliness is killing me".

Brokers;
Two rolled over on me, make sure if yours does you KNOW that you are covered and are not above the threshold. I was sh!tin bricks the first time as I didn't really think it would/could happen, dumb ***!:rolleyes: The second time not so much but you never really know what you've signed up for with all the small print and changes to the t+c's.

Friends and Family;
Tell em to do one when they ask you where they should put their money! Seriously! I also traded with £5000 of my so-called friends money and lost £175 in one week, this caused him to panic and be on the phone every ten mins the next week and me close the account and reimburse the eventual loss of £97. He still brings this up and yet still asked me to trade for him...***orf n stick it in the bank and cry to them that it's making zip.

Money you can't afford to lose; Really, no,no,no! How you gonna handle the divorce and waving goodbye to the kids. When I first started I was all in with every penny I had and I was kin lucky to survive if it had gone the other way I would have needed cutting down, think carefully before you act!

that's enough bollox from me. Trading is hard, it will more than likely take you to places you're never been and it will no doubt keep you awake at night. Trading full-time is for ***in lunatics, that's not to say at times it's not the best money you will ever make, assuming you can, but it will never be a match for a nice little stable income. That's where I'm off to in three weeks time, my first job in five years. Why? 50k down in Jan and having lost the last six months coin from last year, why not. 40k a year and 11 hour days almost seem welcoming.

Attention whore or cautionary tale....BOTH!

Pondy, ex full-timer and now long term investor waiting for the next cycle with a cunning plan.

Good Luck.

S'not dash, hope he's ok and enjoying life as he woz funny and I believe we share a similar tale.
 
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ah, maybe a friend of ron howard then? :)
BTW, humour aside, that was a cracking warts and all post.
 

Sir Pond Life Dreg

Active member
135 125
ah, maybe a friend of ron howard then? :)
BTW, humour aside, that was a cracking warts and all post.

Yeah not too many of them about is there, think it's safe to say most just disappear with their tale :) between their legs and kleenex ( 4 tears. perverts) in hand

Nah, easy mistake though as all three of us at times had a very similar style of posting on this suite of forums,not swanny either, kinell. I was the one wiv the biggest balls but smallest bwain:confused:
 
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counter_violent

Legendary member
10,515 2,784
Tales n sh!T from a eliterate chump...


'Twas five years ago I started trading and quickly jumped into full-time and had a rather wonderful start making more paper than I could imagine.
There were 10k days, 5k days, 000's 10's and of course the odd 10k,5k negative days to match, all of this was a breeze though as I knew I could make any money that I lost back and more besides.

In my time trading I've seen those nasty spreadbetty firms nail my stop, once 150 pips away from market price, 2 brokers make off with my loot after thinking that their monkeys could trade the clients coin, 1000's of forums/twitter/facebookie/real life fantasists disappear after reality had waved it's pork sword in their direction. Just t'other day I was in the gym and met another real life one complete with wife-beater and protein shake who was giving it large and just closing a trade for 5 large on his iphone and saying "nah iz easy bruv not fokin rocket si enz those twatty bankas 'av got it made" whilst up in the gym I noticed that he got into a rather tatty looking Vectra (Y plate) which resembled that smoking meteorite the russkies had blow over the other day. it must have been running on unfiltered cooking oil from the chippy complete with a battered snag stuck in the injectors for full effect!

I've also had a few dirty weekends where I've left open some wild trades which could have quite easily wiped me. when the eu zone was blowing up I had a 25 lotta on and it was 50 pips out of court and at the time I couldn't give a ***c so I left it on and woke up Monday to find i was 5k better off, by the end of the week I was spitting **** as I would have been, assuming I left it open, 110k better off, oh yeah, I finished that week down!
I've been a buyer of equities as they couldn't possibly go any lower, that of course was before they were de-listed. I've missed ***in great moves by hours. I've clicked buy instead of sell numerous times:LOL: always closing out immediately(y) I once fired up a demo account with the same co that I had me real one wiv and opened a 20 conny on crude on the demo, at least that's what I thought, of course it was my real one and I took a $600 for that little mistake:LOL::eek: dumbass!

The forums; omfg hfsb (holy ***in shiitballs) WTF is it with the forums $12 to 50 mil in my lunch break! you dumb carntz you make me feel lyke 'm cleva!
Then of course there is the Jacko's n dare I say Wasp's of the forums who don't mind relieving the good, and if we are honest, gullible people who frequent said forums of their hard earn money.
"Oh yes, I'll trade for you. I consistently make around 30% per month with minimal drawdowns of say 3% and will guarantee your deposit" Yeah ***in right-o. Don't fall for this sh!t chumpz else you will be feeling proppa :cry: gonna be obvious after the event what a dumb muvva you've been innit despite the fact that you've managed to accumulate some serious coin from being a smart mo-fo greed will get ya if ya let it!
My favourite is the monkeys who think they've got it after 2 months and like to shout about it. I hope they can handle what comes next.

Prop firms; Rolled up-to a couple of auditions for prop IDLE and all went well as I baffled 'em with some market knowledge n fired 'em a three month statement of my most profitable periods(y):LOL: One thing that baffled me was during the audition process there were a complete set of new faces there from the first to second stages:eek::idea: To be fair, if I had gone down this route I might still be playing now, as Britney said "My loneliness is killing me".

Brokers;
Two rolled over on me, make sure if yours does you KNOW that you are covered and are not above the threshold. I was sh!tin bricks the first time as I didn't really think it would/could happen, dumb ***!:rolleyes: The second time not so much but you never really know what you've signed up for with all the small print and changes to the t+c's.

Friends and Family;
Tell em to do one when they ask you where they should put their money! Seriously! I also traded with £5000 of my so-called friends money and lost £175 in one week, this caused him to panic and be on the phone every ten mins the next week and me close the account and reimburse the eventual loss of £97. He still brings this up and yet still asked me to trade for him...***orf n stick it in the bank and cry to them that it's making zip.

Money you can't afford to lose; Really, no,no,no! How you gonna handle the divorce and waving goodbye to the kids. When I first started I was all in with every penny I had and I was kin lucky to survive if it had gone the other way I would have needed cutting down, think carefully before you act!

that's enough bollox from me. Trading is hard, it will more than likely take you to places you're never been and it will no doubt keep you awake at night. Trading full-time is for ***in lunatics, that's not to say at times it's not the best money you will ever make, assuming you can, but it will never be a match for a nice little stable income. That's where I'm off to in three weeks time, my first job in five years. Why? 50k down in Jan and having lost the last six months coin from last year, why not. 40k a year and 11 hour days almost seem welcoming.

Attention whore or cautionary tale....BOTH!

Pondy, ex full-timer and now long term investor waiting for the next cycle with a cunning plan.

Good Luck.

S'not dash, hope he's ok and enjoying life as he woz funny and I believe we share a similar tale.

Get over and play some bingo u kin woos :LOL:
http://www.trade2win.com/boards/trading-journals/164344-crazy-dow-b-i-n-g-o.html

At just £5.00 a point and even if it takes you a whole year to complete the card, thats £25k (tax free) large which you will need to supplement the meagre income from the job.
 
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Sir Pond Life Dreg

Active member
135 125

Sir Pond Life Dreg

Active member
135 125
Time to show of my masochistic personality disorder:rolleyes:

Right then, this is where stubbornest,ignorance,frustration (outside of teh tarding) and a healthy dose of a full on meltdown will get you after pretty much 5 years of teh trading managing to avoid such situations and gradually making more paper than I louost n like surviving n stuff.
Looking back on the occasion I can see where I went wrong, ****ing everywhere! I had no right to be gambling like **** and should have wrapped up for the year but no c*ntyboy was gonna see out the year with a big un and look at buying a house. YSLC. you stupid little ****, what a dumb ****! I was over doing crazy **** like this a couple of years ago and never did I rack up 300pp pozzy and hold on for dear life. Guess I did the right thing eventually, if I was still holding on now I would be boned hard right in the ****ter.

Below is what an irrational, frustrated, and extremely stubborn ***** statement looks like after going on tilt and flipping like a cheese omelette. Probably best avoid doing this as it's kind of painful.
I have another account (hedging acc. in case of broker probs.etc. not used for hedging on this occasion though. YSLC) to bring my total losses for six weeks up to an amount which will make my todger limp for the next 3 years!

Right then, this is not for the faint of heart so don't look if you're a pussy faggot with shriveled up knadgers. If you want some lulzy shiz av a gander!
None of ya photoshop 300000% after work whilst banging the neighbours wife here. Just real, hard pain fool.
Don't let it happen to you! YSLC's

Oh yeah I'm offering mentoring services if anyone's interested, seems like the dun thing wen this **** happenz(y)

Kin hell sharky's sent a arthritic carrier pigeon with cataracts to collect the the attachments. can't upload those mo-fo's atm. (n)
 

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Vasco da Banana

Established member
699 121
At last, teh loosing tarders have found a voice again.
 

BeginnerJoe

Senior member
3,329 350
Even though I am the official expert on statements, I find yours rather confusing. Why are the returned to card amounts some positive and some negative ? To make my life easier, can you just give me a figure the bucketshop did you for ?

BTW, your statement is not as bad as it looks. Few here can or willing to swing that kinda monies. It takes a man of great means. There's plenty where that came from.

Also the ftse is in a raging bull market, what is you reasoning to short ? Picking the top ?
 
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Sir Pond Life Dreg

Active member
135 125
At last, teh loosing tarders have found a voice again.

No-one loses in teh forums, all winners innit. I just like to wave two fingers at the regime man! I like to be different and this is my way of showing it.


It felt a bit like that time I got caught short whilst shopping on Regent street in the run-up to Chrimbo!

PS
Paz is that you you cheeky little devil.
 
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Sir Pond Life Dreg

Active member
135 125
Even though I am the official expert on statements, I find yours rather confusing. Why are the returned to card amounts some positive and some negative ? To make my life easier, can you just give me a figure the bucketshop did you for ?
Well spotted BJ, Some of the buckets will only return 20 kin large to ya palstic in 1 day. They don't mind taking 50 kin large in a day though

BTW, your statement is not as bad as you think. Few here can or willing to swing that kinda monies. It takes a man of great means. There's plenty where that came from.
Nah It's only money and it was on loan from the markets so lesson learnt. At least that's what I tell myself in between the sobbing fits and self harming:LOL: note to self; Don't be a SLC else the markets will bone ya
Also the ftse is in a raging bull market, what is you reasoning to short ? Picking the top ?
Yeah ****ing went for it, can't go any higher the worlds ****ed and I was in for the ride until the bitter end....well until reality struck and then pulled out quicker than a unwrapped 16 y/o getting his first bunk up and on the vinegar stroke. Good job too

. total loses for the month are in the op I can't type it again as I get all twitchy n know i'll stab myself in the urethra with a bic biro.
 
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I don't know, 5 years counts for something.
You don't last 5 years if you have no idea.
Everyone has f**ked up at some point, I know I have.
 
 
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