Best Thread Joke of the day

[PieterSteidelmayer]

Pavlov is sitting in the pub having a pint. The phone rings. He jumps up and says "****, I forgot to feed the dog!"

 

[PieterSteidelmayer]

Buddhist monk goes up to a hotdog stand and says "Make me one with everything".

 

[PieterSteidelmayer]

Us wacky Germans, eh? Always having laughs.

 

[PieterSteidelmayer]

Jean-Paul Satre is sitting in a cafe revising a draft of his "Being and Nothingness". He says to the waitress "A coffee with no cream please". The waitress replies "I'm sorry monsieur we're out of cream. How about a coffee with no milk?".

 

[Pat494]

Don't let's get depressed.

 

[PieterSteidelmayer]

What do you call a room full of dead people with balloons, streamers and party hats?


An Oscar Pistorious surprise birthday party.

 

[Atilla]

 

[joeycoyle]

What do you call a hooker with a runny nose?



FULL!

 

[PieterSteidelmayer]

Nike have reviewed their brand image after sponsorship decisions around OJ Simpson and Oscar Pistorious and have decided to change their byline to "Just Don't Do It".

 

[PieterSteidelmayer]

Breaking news that in the search for the missing Malaysian plane they have found the wings. They're now looking for the wongs.







If this is considered beyond the pale then please delete it with my apologies, but it didn't appear to break any t2w guidelines, only those of good taste.

 

[MajorMagnuM]

Breaking news that in the search for the missing Malaysian plane they have found the wings. They're now looking for the wongs.







If this is considered beyond the pale then please delete it with my apologies, but it didn't appear to break any t2w guidelines, only those of good taste.

Classy, as always

 

[Atilla]

Classy, as always

Not classy at all but the timing is plainly wrong before discovering well being of passengers.

Tut tut tut, bad Pieter.

 

[PieterSteidelmayer]

Not classy at all but the timing is plainly wrong before discovering well being of passengers.

If the passengers are found to be alive and well then this becomes a non-joke.

If it is discovered that they have all perished, it becomes a joke in bad taste. There are plenty of others in this thread.

Given the disposition of the passengers is currently unknown it is potentially funny. That's what we all thought anyway, especially as it was a Thai chap telling it to us.

 

[PieterSteidelmayer]

Not classy at all but the timing is plainly wrong before discovering well being of passengers.

Aaargghhhh...just got it. That's the 2nd time tonight my defenses have been breached. I am beginning to think I may be mortal after all.

 

[Atilla]

Should have gone to Butlins

 

[Atilla]

Sellotape selfies

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/u...elfie-as-the-latest-online-trend-9206203.html

 

[timsk]

Sellotape selfies

Looks like a Francis Bacon painting!

 

[Pat494]

The jokes about German sausage are the wurst.

 

[PieterSteidelmayer]

The jokes about German sausage are the wurst.

Are you trying to curry favor with me?

 

[joeycoyle]

Don't get saucy with me, Bernaise!