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Old Sep 28, 2009, 9:42pm   #127
 
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Oh and Travis; I payed someone to make me an automated system... I want to learn how to do it myself, to backtest systems - Make them, test them; All that stuff

Any recommendations on how i can learn, books, websites, software? I really have no idea
Would really appreciate it? Also do you recommend using indicators for systems or price action or?

Cheers Stallian.
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Old Sep 28, 2009, 10:31pm   #128
 
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Originally Posted by GladiatorX View Post
Yeah Totally agree.
The question is whether being in the herd is better after all.


Yes i'm athiest; in some ways i wish i could get over my negative attitudes about God and the lack of logic and the clear fact that he doesn't exist; and just be a christian and have blind hope and faith and the other benefits that come from that... But i think for me to be able to revert to Christianity would mean i would have totally changed my entire thinking approach to just about everything i know.

I suppose i always have the problem of looking at the negatives; if i'm watching television; somehow i annoy myself by how the **** the editing in a problem is or how bad an idea a program is. For example Strictly come dancing, i spent the entire time talking out loud saying that i genuinely cannot think of a worse idea for a television program and then after i think to myself that my views are so negative; that i probably couldn't do better myself. In reality though; in my mind anyway, i could make a much better tv program... Maybe my lack of satisfaction in life is due to having strong opinions on everything without having any sort of standing/qualifications/skills to prove that i can do a better job.

Are you genuinely diagnosed with personality disorders or are you self-prescribed?
I've never really considered whether i have one; I'm so down to earth in my thinking that i have never considered i may have a psychological disorder beyond stubborness and emotions.

I think its interesting that your into movies because i very much am too; i think its because its one of the few times i can get away from thinking too much about everything

Whats your views on music? Interested to see if they are similar to mine

The thing about Narcissism; which i just googled; is that previously unaware of my problems, i thought that i was naturally good at everything and could do everything better myself; now i'm starting to realise that my brain creates an illusion of how good i am at things... Therefore when i lose/fail; its harder because i had such large expectations based on that illusion. At the same time though; i do genuinely think i'm good at things and it annoys me when things don't gratify that... For example; School work - I knew i was good and then they gave me a bad mark, i couldn't accept that i needed to improve, i would just tell myself that they are a **** teacher who can't mark... I guess i assume the worst in everybody and assume total trust in my own ability - Rightly or wrongly. Similar to your psychiatrist example; i went to the doctors to check up on something and they diagnosed me and i knew they were wrong... I had done my own research and i knew they were wrong in their diagnosis; Not that i know anything about the medical proffesion but i just always assume the worst in peoples abilities and feel that i can do most things - I think overall its bad. My brothers the same too

You say 'You could talk as if you were one' A psychiatrist; Sorry if my spelling is bad. I always feel like that about most things; I may not have the first clue about psychology but i always feel i naturally know the answers because i can logically figure them out... I think overall it just stunts further education in a subject through not having an open mind.

I've also always had a lack of empathy; when i see things on the news that others get really sad for; i just feel because its on the TV and that it has nothing to do with me, that i have trouble feeling sorry for them. For example; On the BBC all the time is stories of young men injured in war; i cannot feel sympathy because i cannot get past my own philosophy; Which is that if you go to a war and accept the rewards, you know the risks include death and if this is a consequence so be it, your the one that took that risk, not me; Therefore i cannot feel sorry for these men... If i went to war and died i would have taken that risk into consideration before going and i wouldn't expect sympathy, especially when they are fighting for reasons they as soldiers do not understand. I do think to myself that 'these poor men dieing from bombs' but i find it hard to empathise with their pain; i cannot get over the fact they took the risks and they deserve the consequences. I wish i could not feel like that though.
I will reply as I read.

You sound very intelligent. You see, if you are intelligent and mature, you can reason better than other people regardless of age or anything else. I am sure you already knew that. Probably your parents passed on to you many of their good qualities: maturity, culture, intelligence.

I am self-prescribed with personality disorders.

Movies: yes, me, too. The good ones make me forget about my own thinking or criticising.

Music: over the years I have selected about 1000 of my favorite songs, and I put them on a dvd, and give them to people and tell them "these are the best songs ever written", and I almost feel like I wrote them.

Personality disorders: you can find many tests and resources online, even on wikipedia. And they can give you a better diagnosis than the average psychiastrist, who won't even start telling you about it ever or before you've given him maybe a few thousand dollars (not that I went to one for more than a few sessions).

School and grades: I had a similar attitude. When they gave me a bad grade, I stopped studying for that class, and "failed" the teacher, as if I said "this teacher is no good, because he can't appreciate me". I do the same with people: if someone doesn't like me, I fail them as well. I think that to some degree everyone does it.

Assuming the worst in everybody: yes, me, too. But it's just because I was brought to do things so meticulously that actually the majority does them worse than me, so it is a reasonable expectation.

Anyway, take a few of those online tests for personality disorders, and see that many things will qualify for narcissistic personality disorder. Or maybe not. I qualify almost completely. "Control freak" is another description of the problem, very close to "narcissistic personality disorder". But you know, maybe you don't have a problem. The problem is when it inteferes with your functioning and it makes you unhappy like in my case. If you can relate to people, be relaxed, and feel serene, then there's no problem I think, and then I don't think you have any disorder. Basically, do people perceive you as balanced or not? I am not perceived as balanced, nor do I perceive myself as balanced. All these addictions I have, especially my behaviour in trading, shows that there's something wrong, and that I haven't been able to fix it so far. On the other hand we also have to realize that we might be facing, as traders, situations of pressure (you're deciding your whole future with your trading choices), that would throw many people off balance.




Quote:
You say 'You could talk as if you were one' A psychiatrist; Sorry if my spelling is bad. I always feel like that about most things; I may not have the first clue about psychology but i always feel i naturally know the answers because i can logically figure them out... I think overall it just stunts further education in a subject through not having an open mind.
I feel like I sound like an expert in everything I say. I may sound cocky or even ignorant, but I always feel that I've become enough of an expert to be opinionated and say "it is like this". Maybe I won't say much, but I will only say it if I am positive. 1+1=2. That's how positive I have to feel about something before I say it, regardless of my adding constantly "maybe" and "probably", which is just a ruse to be right all the time. If I didn't say "maybe" I would risk not being right, in case I said something wrong. And I realize that sometimes I say something wrong, even if at the time of saying it I feel that i am positive about it.



Lack of empathy: exact same thing for me. As I said, I feel that I am at the center of the world. I can't feel empathy. I tried to find out why one becomes like this, but it's long. However, the explanations they give on the web sound good to me: either too much attention, or too little attention when growing up. I was told I had to be the best, and yet I was also told I sucked because I wasn't succeeding at being the best. Maybe some coaches may sound like my dad, when they try to push their athletes to try as hard as possible - at least that's how they sound in movies.


Your "signature":
Quote:
The markets are the most competitive place in the world. Yet success requires the least competitive mindset in the market. The market thrives by taking money off the majority; the competitive, egotistical and then dividing it between those that accepted the reality of their abilities and the markets movements and predictability and didn't associate pride with the process.
Pride in the process: big problem I have. Being individualist and narcissist and so on goes along with pride. That could be another explanation of why I failed for so many years at discretionary trading.
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Old Sep 28, 2009, 10:45pm   #129
 
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Originally Posted by GladiatorX View Post
Oh and Travis; I payed someone to make me an automated system... I want to learn how to do it myself, to backtest systems - Make them, test them; All that stuff

Any recommendations on how i can learn, books, websites, software? I really have no idea
Would really appreciate it? Also do you recommend using indicators for systems or price action or?

Cheers Stallian.
This is funny. After all we said, how could I recommend any books? I didn't read any. Actually only Walkenbach's manuals on excel, because I wrote my systems on excel (many years of work). But I only read them at work, because I had nothing to do. It was like being in jail: I couldn't leave and I had nothing to do. Otherwise I never would have read anything. Also, a whole book, but very short, that I recently read - but it didn't teach me anything, as it just satisfied my curiosity - it E.P.Chan's book on automated trading systems. On chapter 8 he tells something I've always wondered about: how is it possible that a guy like me, from home, with little money, no scientific college degree (like engineering or so), can outperform by so much banks, hedge funds and so on? Capacity and other reasons. I feel that a part of not succeeding is in not believing it's possible. Despite the fact that i started simply because others told me it was impossible, I still had to make the step of actually believing myself that it was possible, and I am still having a hard time with it. I am asking myself all the time "how is it possible? how can I make it? how can it be so easy?".

On the web, what I do recommend very much is the best forum for automated trading, which is:
Forums - Automated Trading

I do recommend also to open an account with Interactive Brokers, but on the other hand I have no idea about what the other brokers are offering. But go with quantity. Wherever there's a lot of customers, things work better. At least with brokers. Of course I am talking about other requirements as well. But if they both have the reqs then go with the one that has the most customers. Just my (not-so-humble) opinion.

I don't feel like telling you all the ideas I am using. But I can tell you this: don't focus on making one perfect system, because it won't happen (you'll waste years trying in vain), and in the meanwhile - or even faster - you can just make 50 pretty good systems. Then use them all together, on the same capital, and you'll make a fortune - that is, if you can just let them run by themselves, and trust them, something that might not happen for a whole year (regardless of whether you have an addiction to trading or not).

Then again, if you are similar to me, you won't listen to any of my advice, or even will do the opposite to make sure that you're not missing out on anything.
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Old Sep 28, 2009, 11:54pm   #130
 
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Originally Posted by travis View Post
This is funny. After all we said, how could I recommend any books? I didn't read any. Actually only Walkenbach's manuals on excel, because I wrote my systems on excel (many years of work). But I only read them at work, because I had nothing to do. It was like being in jail: I couldn't leave and I had nothing to do. Otherwise I never would have read anything. Also, a whole book, but very short, that I recently read - but it didn't teach me anything, as it just satisfied my curiosity - it E.P.Chan's book on automated trading systems. On chapter 8 he tells something I've always wondered about: how is it possible that a guy like me, from home, with little money, no scientific college degree (like engineering or so), can outperform by so much banks, hedge funds and so on? Capacity and other reasons. I feel that a part of not succeeding is in not believing it's possible. Despite the fact that i started simply because others told me it was impossible, I still had to make the step of actually believing myself that it was possible, and I am still having a hard time with it. I am asking myself all the time "how is it possible? how can I make it? how can it be so easy?".

On the web, what I do recommend very much is the best forum for automated trading, which is:
Forums - Automated Trading

I do recommend also to open an account with Interactive Brokers, but on the other hand I have no idea about what the other brokers are offering. But go with quantity. Wherever there's a lot of customers, things work better. At least with brokers. Of course I am talking about other requirements as well. But if they both have the reqs then go with the one that has the most customers. Just my (not-so-humble) opinion.

I don't feel like telling you all the ideas I am using. But I can tell you this: don't focus on making one perfect system, because it won't happen (you'll waste years trying in vain), and in the meanwhile - or even faster - you can just make 50 pretty good systems. Then use them all together, on the same capital, and you'll make a fortune - that is, if you can just let them run by themselves, and trust them, something that might not happen for a whole year (regardless of whether you have an addiction to trading or not).

Then again, if you are similar to me, you won't listen to any of my advice, or even will do the opposite to make sure that you're not missing out on anything.
Thanks for the response Travis. I think the diversification of systems is a good idea; having a range that incorporate the possibility of different market condition. I think thats what i will focus on; having sub-categories of different moves i will aim to catch and then having all the systems running at once so that i can catch ranging and trend days

This may seem a bit weird; but as i can relate to you so much, i value your ideas as much as i do my own because to some extent i consider you an older version of myself and therefore it is within my capacity to accept that your ideas are probably better/more developed than my own. I have some ideas though about systems and how to catch different market conditions so hopefully its fun making the 'Money-making machine'.

I know asking for your book recommendations was ironic, but personally while i'm an extreme critic, i do read books that explain how to actually factually do something, like how to use excel for example I also read books on trading, with the satisfaction coming from my own criticisms of how bad some of the ideas are rather than a focus on learning - God, i'm terrible.

Anyway; Cheers for the advice

I took some tests; would seem i have Narcissistic personality disorder - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Its interesting because supposedly narcissitic behaviours are a cover up for a deep self-loathing.

Anyways; Laters Travis, i'll make some systems best i can! x
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Old Sep 29, 2009, 8:58am   #131
 
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travis started this thread But you are more mature/better version of me because you don't seem to be affected by compulsive gambling addictions. I am glad we are both disturbed in the same way - we can share some more experiences. But one comment: if you don't have any negative aspects of the disorder then maybe you don't have it after all. It has to ruin your daily life. You know, I also read that as teen-agers everyone goes from one disorder to the other, so it may also be a temporary thing for you. For me it certainly isn't and it does interfere with leading a happy life. I am not happy. I am constantly frustrated. Can you say the same about yourself?
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Old Sep 29, 2009, 2:43pm   #132
 
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But you are more mature/better version of me because you don't seem to be affected by compulsive gambling addictions. I am glad we are both disturbed in the same way - we can share some more experiences. But one comment: if you don't have any negative aspects of the disorder then maybe you don't have it after all. It has to ruin your daily life. You know, I also read that as teen-agers everyone goes from one disorder to the other, so it may also be a temporary thing for you. For me it certainly isn't and it does interfere with leading a happy life. I am not happy. I am constantly frustrated. Can you say the same about yourself?
I think, having really only considered i have this 'disorder'; that its too early days to assess whether i have it; one thing is though is that its extremely difficult for me to accept i may have a psychological problem however maybe i do when i really think about my behaviour.
One thing is that i cannot accept criticisms at all and i'm extremely intolerant of most things... I've really tried to get over these factors in trading and i definately have to a certain extent however when i'm not concentrating on my emotions and trying hard to avoid my feelings; in life they are still there as natural tendencies...

Frustration with just about everything i do; from criticizing tv, to playing games and to chatting to people about things... I just get easily annoyed and i'm highly sensitive to others opinions of me; i think it does massively affect my life and what i do and at the moment i'm generally unhappy but i cannot identify the problem... Because technically it would seem i have 'everything going at the moment' yet i feel totally unsatisfied and annoyed inside.
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Old Sep 29, 2009, 4:18pm   #133
 
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One thing is that i cannot accept criticisms at all and i'm extremely intolerant of most things...
Exactly the same with me.

Quote:
...highly sensitive to others opinions of me...
Exactly the same with me.

Quote:
...everything going at the moment' yet i feel totally unsatisfied and annoyed inside...
Exactly the same with me. No matter what others said I had going for me, at any time of my life, I felt bad. But there is one important thing to add: I was looking for my dad's approval and consent to be happy and he never gave it to me. He never told me "good job, now you can rest". I remember when I was 25 and called him from overseas and told him "look, I have a girlfriend, I have a job: I am happy". And he replied "you have no reason to be happy: right now all you have is your health and one never knows how long that lasts". I'd say in my case all my problems derive from having a ******* as a father. Actually I never had any doubts about this. So, unlike you, I totally know the reason for my unhappiness: an unhappy life, due to having a ******* for a father.
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