Uber Noobs Top 20 Nonsense

Uber Noob

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1.Price will change with time. NOWAY!





2.Price does not move in one direction. In-fact, it doesn't actually move it only changes; the illusion of movement is your charts doing. Keep reading; I get more interesting later. :p





3.Intra-day/Weekly/Monthly and Yearly first extremes are most likely to occur in the first half of said time-period and the second extremes are most likely to occur in the second half of said time-period.






4.On the other hand both extremes of said time-periods are least likely to occur in close succession to each other.





5.'losses' are inevitable. (Concentrate on the aftermath of many trades not just the one.)





6.Paying spread is as certain as death and taxes. It's so certain that the proverb should be changed to: 'as certain as spread and taxes'.





7.Martingale strategies will make you zillions; so long as you have infinite funds at disposal, ironically enough :p





8.Entries are to risk as exits are to reward.





9.Ask is to buy as bid is to sell.





10.Margin is divined from leverage and lot-size.





11.Programming causes headaches; a necessary evil.




12.Compounded interest is OP, IMBA, l33t, GODLIKE and UBER.








13.Everybody lies.





14.Money probably grows on trees.





15.Formula to calculate compounded interest is:

1. account_size*(1+%interest)^(how many times)
2. for example 10 dollar account with 1% interest 500 times = 1447.73
3. in other words 10*(1+0.01)^(500)=1447.73.






16.If my uncle gave me 1 cent today and 2 cents tomorrow and 4 cents the next day and kept doubling it like that everyday for a total of 30 days I'd have: 1+(2^29)+(2^28)+(2^27)+(2^26)+(2^25 )+(2^24)+(2^23)+(2^22)+(2^21)+(2^20 )+(2^19)+(2^18)+(2^17)+(2^16)+(2^15 )+(2^14)+(2^13)+(2^12)+(2^11)+(2^10 )+(2^9)+(2^8)+(2^7)+(2^6)+(2^5)+(2^ 4)+(2^3)+(2^2)+(2^1)=$10,737,400.00







17.If I had 10 dollars and my bank offered an annual interest of 5% how long would it take me to make ONE MILLION DOLLARS ZOMG?

1. 10*1.05^x=1000k
2. 1.05^x=1000k/10=100k
3. xln(1.05)=ln(100k)
4. x=ln(100k)/ln(1.05)
5. x=~235.968
6. 236 YEARS FOR ONE MILLION ISNT EXACTLY A GET RICH QUICK SCHEME :p IN-FACT I'D WAIT 100 YEARS LONGER TO GET $131,706,000.00






18.A trader is as much a gambler as any other professional or living creature for that matter. Just think about it; what's the risk/reward of crossing a street these days :p If we cannot be certain about certainty then everyone in existence is gambling. Therefore there are only good gamblers & bad gamblers.






19.Two quotes that inspire me:

1. "Losers always whine about doing their best; winners, they go home and f*** the prom-queen" -The Rock, John Patrick Mason played by Shawn Connery
2. "It helps to know that they're all idiots." -House M.D., Gregory House played by Hugh Laurie







20.ONLY LOSERS SPELL LOSERS WITH TWO O's!
 
Last edited:
1.Price will change with time. NOWAY!





2.Price does not move in one direction. In-fact, it doesn't actually move it only changes; the illusion of movement is your charts doing. Keep reading; I get more interesting later. :p





3.Intra-day/Weekly/Monthly and Yearly first extremes are most likely to occur in the first half of said time-period and the second extremes are most likely to occur in the second half of said time-period.






4.On the other hand both extremes of said time-periods are least likely to occur in close succession to each other.





5.'losses' are inevitable. (Concentrate on the aftermath of many trades not just the one.)





6.Paying spread is as certain as death and taxes. It's so certain that the proverb should be changed to: 'as certain as spread and taxes'.





7.Martingale strategies will make you zillions; so long as you have infinite funds at disposal, ironically enough :p





8.Entries are to risk as exits are to profit.





9.Ask is to buy as bid is to sell.





10.Margin is divined from leverage and lot-size.





11.Programming causes headaches; a necessary evil.




12.Compounded interest is OP, IMBA, l33t, GODLIKE and UBER.








13.Everybody lies.





14.Money probably grows on trees.





15.Formula to calculate compounded interest is:

1. account_size*(1+%interest)^(how many times)
2. for example 10 dollar account with 1% interest 500 times = 1447.73
3. in other words 10*(1+0.01)^(500)=1447.73.






16.If my uncle gave me 1 cent today and 2 cents tomorrow and 4 cents the next day and kept doubling it like that everyday for a total of 30 days I'd have: 1+(2^29)+(2^28)+(2^27)+(2^26)+(2^25 )+(2^24)+(2^23)+(2^22)+(2^21)+(2^20 )+(2^19)+(2^18)+(2^17)+(2^16)+(2^15 )+(2^14)+(2^13)+(2^12)+(2^11)+(2^10 )+(2^9)+(2^8)+(2^7)+(2^6)+(2^5)+(2^ 4)+(2^3)+(2^2)+(2^1)=$10,737,400.00







17.If I had 10 dollars and my bank offered an annual interest of 5% how long would it take me to make ONE MILLION DOLLARS ZOMG?

1. 10*1.05^x=1000k
2. 1.05^x=1000k/10=100k
3. xln(1.05)=ln(100k)
4. x=ln(100k)/ln(1.05)
5. x=~235.968
6. 236 YEARS FOR ONE MILLION ISNT EXACTLY A GET RICH QUICK SCHEME :p IN-FACT I'D WAIT 100 YEARS LONGER TO GET $131,706,000.00






18.A trader is as much a gambler as any other professional or living creature for that matter. Just think about it; what's the risk/reward of crossing a street these days :p If we cannot be certain about certainty then everyone in existence is gambling. Therefore there are only good gamblers & bad gamblers.






19.Two quotes that inspire me:

1. "Losers always whine about doing their best; winners, they go home and f*** the prom-queen" -The Rock, John Patrick Mason played by Shawn Connery
2. "It helps to know that they're all idiots." -House M.D., Gregory House played by Hugh Laurie







20.ONLY LOSERS SPELL LOSERS WITH TWO O's!

Hi Uber,
Definitely worth reading, as it took you more than 1.5 years to compose it it!!!
 
8.Stops are to risk as exits are to profit

Thanks for the reply, however since we're comparing it to exits then it must be entries.... notice the symmetry :p 'Stops' would go with 'Takeprofits' and not with exits :p

I should probably clarify what it really means.When you enter a trade you take on risk. When you exit a trade you take out profit (hopefully:clover:) :)

Although I do notice now that it'd make far more sense if instead of profit I said reward; seeing as how most people associate risk with reward. However, profit does mean the same thing. It must be the alliteration that keeps us from says risk/profit instead of risk/reward.

Gonna edit it. Thanks for your helps with this nonsense :p
 
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