Fed Up!!!

Ok...

re: Driving - get a book called Roadcraft. It's the advanced driver's bible. Start to drive by what's called "the system" religiously. This will help as ideally you can get into a position where you're so far beyond test standards you'd laugh at them. Speak to your local ROSPA or IAM advanced driving group and ask to be taken out by an observer before you've passed.

re: Trading - sorry to hear about your predicament, the reality is that the odds are stacked ludicrously against the retail trader who uses either leverage or rapid trading styles, and you need to accept that that is the case, and ignore the morons here who claim otherwise... they're just as bad as you, or possibly worse. Once you realise that there's no need to beat yourself up about not measuring up to others' misconcpetions, lies, and delusions :)

re: Panic Attacks - try beta blockers. All evidence points to emotions originating physically in the brain, therefore psychological issues can be seen as an engineering problem. Therefore drugs are a good thing. Off label use of beta blockers has a stellar success rate here, as I understand it. Talk to GP.
 
I hate my job (work in a pub).

I think Wasp used to work in a pub too.

If Wasp had gone down the Vendor route instead of the Ponzi scheme route he could have done really well, he had quite a following on trade2win.
 
Telling someone to man up! is like kinda calling them to stop being a pussy. :-0

Oh all - right then I'll just pull my self together and brush my hair shall I? :cheesy:

I know it looks like I'm saying "mean" things or lulz things etc etc, but the OP asks for words of wisdom and I gave mine based on what I know and he can either take them or not take them, it's no difference to me. (i don't have mental health problems, but i have a physical health problem)

i could say do x, do y, do z, but i have done this in the past when other people asked for advice and then i go back weeks or months later and say "how are you getting on, have you done this, what happened...?" and 9 times out of 10 they will have taken absolutely no advice, have done nothing and still be having the same problem, so just a waste of time in the first place really and that's why i no longer give specific advice.
 
I know it looks like I'm saying "mean" things or lulz things etc etc, but the OP asks for words of wisdom and I gave mine based on what I know and he can either take them or not take them, it's no difference to me. (i don't have mental health problems, but i have a physical health problem)

i could say do x, do y, do z, but i have done this in the past when other people asked for advice and then i go back weeks or months later and say "how are you getting on, have you done this, what happened...?" and 9 times out of 10 they will have taken absolutely no advice, have done nothing and still be having the same problem, so just a waste of time in the first place really and that's why i no longer give specific advice.

You seem like a frustrated adviser. 9 times out of 10? That's a lot of advice you are giving out.
 
I know it looks like I'm saying "mean" things or lulz things etc etc, but the OP asks for words of wisdom and I gave mine based on what I know and he can either take them or not take them, it's no difference to me. (i don't have mental health problems, but i have a physical health problem)

i could say do x, do y, do z, but i have done this in the past when other people asked for advice and then i go back weeks or months later and say "how are you getting on, have you done this, what happened...?" and 9 times out of 10 they will have taken absolutely no advice, have done nothing and still be having the same problem, so just a waste of time in the first place really and that's why i no longer give specific advice.


I too have learnt from my Mrs not to give advice but listen. I usually put the telly on mute and bring up the subtitles. Nice cup of chai and some biscuits and that's it.
It is very difficult to know what the real problem is. Usually - she gets to the solution by reasoning out all the probabilities and possibilities by her self, whilst talking to me. At the end of it my brain is normally well fried and ready for slumber... :eek:

C'est la vie eh? :cheesy:

During the 1st World War men suffering from shell shock were put through some horrendous treatment - basic torture really. They were told to stop being cowardly whimps because problem was not understood. In fact the doctors were so very in-to their good treatment - they sent the brain damaged vegetables back into the trenches to die like men. Perhaps it was good advice - better to be simply shot dead than being electrocuted through the brain - with ones' tongue hanging out. What do I know??? :eek: http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/A46378245

Those Victorians always knew what had to be done and they jolly well went ahead and did it. Telling one to stop being a whimp is like giving someone Electroconvulsive Therapy (ECT)

I do agree with you in that sometimes its best to listen and not give any advice at all.

Have a good evening... (y)
 
Hi Megamuel,

A thoughtful and honest post which I suspect may stir memories in some of your readers. It rightly deserves the sympathetic answers you have received. If I might add my thoughts (I’m no expert in these matters) but I have, like many people at one time or another, experienced the depths of despair and can thus empathise to some degree.


I suspect your main problem is low self-esteem. This is far from uncommon and funnily enough often affects people who should be thinking far better of themselves. You can get over this and you will almost certainly find it easier to do so with proper help. One of the problems of feeling like you do is that you won’t think straight and that will affect your whole life and what you do. So take the first step and get qualified help – I’d suggest a chat with your GP.

You’ve elucidated your thoughts very clearly and even feeling as you do, are determined to succeed at trading in addition to wanting to get a driving licence and start your own business – these are not the thoughts of a failure! If you can still think like this at the bottom, just imagine how it will be when you’re back on an even keel – no limits!

As for the job “Had a sh1te night in work. ,I hate my job (work in a pub).” – I take my hat off to you: I couldn’t work in a pub & keep my cool. These are all the more reason for striking out - look at the sh1te job as a stepping stone to something better.


As for trading “I can't trade for sh1t. Been trying to learn for over 2 years now and feel like I'm going backwards. Done very little actual trading in that time as I have not found an 'edge'.” I've been a member of that club! Perhaps many of us have felt like that. I’m lucky enough to be able to self-teach myself most things but many, many people don’t find that comes easily – maybe you’re one of them? So, after you’ve sorted the self-esteem why not find a mentor who will help you with trading? There are good guys out there who can help you, and if they are a mate will do it for free or over a few quiet beers!


“I like the challenge of trading, it's definitely what I want to do I just feel like I am getting nowhere with it. I keep thinking about giving the trading dream up but I can't.... I really want to be a trader” – That's ambition. It will take you far when you start thinking straight. Write it out now and pin it on the wall and look at it everyday – that is your ambition.


"I feel I can't do anything else because of my panic attacks. interviews and driving test are a no no as I either puke or faint I can drive alright I just can't do the test... Doesn't help that I'm thick as pig sh1t." This is not unusual! My wife has a PhD and used to suffer as you – it’s got little to do with brainpower I can assure you.
And with the right help you will overcome it. PS. - I'd be surprised if most of us haven't at some time or other felt that "I'm thick as pig sh1t."

"So what do you guys do when you are really fed up and feeling low? How do you cheer yourselves up or relax." The standard way for many blokes is to go out with their mates and get pi$$ed out of their brains – ok for short term but no good in the long run. You do need to talk to somebody – trying to cope entirely on your own is the most difficult way and least likely to succeed. You obviously appreciate that by posting here. Again, get some proper listening help.


“Anyway, I know y'all don't care I just need to have a good moan sometimes and there is nobody here to listen to me other than you guys.... My T2W friends. In fact I like you lot much more than my colleagues and customers!” That’s very complimentary to us all on T2W and looking at some of the miserable ba$tards who post on T2W you are indeed being generous – you certainly sound as if you have a more balanced personality than me; but then I couldn’t work in a pub without upsetting the customers.


So, don’t give up. Someone once said “things are never quite as good or bad as they seemed at the time” It’s true. And you can change things for the better.

Best of luck.
 
I feel for you m8. This is from painful personal experience but some people just have 'overactive and irrational' systems, I can't deal with people in any situation, they just wind me up until I want to puke, you can't rationalise the irrational. Other things going on are an overactive immune system...if i'm not careful it tries to kill me basically. An adrenalin shot is not far away, especially in summer LOL.

Stay away from self medication, stay away from doctors if you can help it i.m.e all they try to do is put you on pills (beta blockers, SSRIs, diazies etc.) and in the long run all they do is f**k you up even more. The CBT they offer in my experience is nigh on useless. When you are completely desperate/embarrased/unsure/want to kill yourself, the last thing you want to do is open up to a room full of strangers. In fact over the 6 weeks (which is what you'll get) the other attendees constant whining will make you feel far worse than when you went in. The main thing you'll get from it is breathing exercises. Look them up on the internet.

As a good friend of mine once said 'The only time my wife tried to knife me was when she was on Prozac'. He wasn't joking, it happened:LOL:

What works for me...do your absolute best to STOP THINKING ABOUT YOUR PROBLEM, you're convincing yourself you are ill (which you are) but you've got to convince yourself that you aren't. DO NOT lie in bed when yo uwake up in the morning worrying. Get out of bed as soon as you wake, get your clothes on and go for a brisk walk. Find something you can get COMPLETELY absorbed in, whether it be writing, music, whatever. Become as good as you possible can be at it, find what you have a talent for and become the best you can be. Start exercising and I don't just mean a bit of a walk, I mean heavy, intense exercise, not only does it take your mind of your problems,you HAVE to focus on what you are doing, added benefits are better self esteem (although I KNOW it will still be poor), stress relief and endorphin release.

IME there is no 'cure' but you can make things better for yourself and for those that have to put up with you because, believe you me, if you're anything like me you're one HUGE PITA:LOL: (maybe not, just joking).

As for trading, well, personally that's one of the things apart from my 'skill' that I DON'T get anxious about. Pretty cool when there's a trade on. Tried scalping, didn't work for me, longer term stuff where you need to analyse and plan and get ABSORBED in the process. Excellent.

So view trading as therapy for now. Don't try to make money, either just demo or go very small stakes.

Trading is not a race.
 
Wow! This a great thread for confessions! I did not realise that some of you have been great sources of information to me.

Hwever, in spite of you............:eek:

Come on guys! Lighten up. I'm depending on you to help me make a crust! :clap:

I thought that I was a miserable sod!
 
I'm feelin' so fed up tonight... Had a sh1te night in work. I hate my job (work in a pub). I can't trade for sh1t. Been trying to learn for over 2 years now and feel like I'm going backwards. Done very little actual trading in that time as I have not found an 'edge'. Doesn't help that I'm thick as pig sh1t. I keep thinking about giving the trading dream up but I can't.... I really want to be a trader and also I feel I can't do anything else because of my panic attacks - interviews and driving test are a no no as I either puke or faint :cry: I can drive alright I just can't do the test... If I could get a license I's like to start up a business doing carpet cleaning or something but I can't do the f**king test. Besides, I like the challenge of trading, it's definitely what I want to do I just feel like I am getting nowhere with it.

Anyway, I know y'all don't care I just need to have a good moan sometimes and there is nobody here to listen to me other than you guys.... My T2W friends. In fact I like you lot much more than my colleagues and customers!

So what do you guys do when you are really fed up and feeling low? How do you cheer yourselves up or relax? Any good jokes? Quotes? Words of wisdom? Sympathy? Ideas. N don't take the **** or I'll get Pazienza to behead you...

Sam.



Some people are very insecure for whatever reason, the market is not a good place for these people.

You don't have to be a raging extrovert but a person has to be at least quietly confident.

I think most normal people are put off trading because of the lack of guarantees, the less sensitive types can get around this.

Its all psychological.

Good luck mate.
 
Some people are very insecure for whatever reason, the market is not a good place for these people.

You don't have to be a raging extrovert but a person has to be at least quietly confident.

I think most normal people are put off trading because of the lack of guarantees, the less sensitive types can get around this.

Its all psychological.

Good luck mate.

Jesse Livermore summed it up best back in 1940, shortly before he blew his own brains out:

"The game of speculation is the most uniformly fascinating game in the world. But it is not a game for the stupid, the mentally lazy, the man of inferior emotional balance, or for the get-rich-quick adventurer. They will die poor."
 
Jesse Livermore summed it up best back in 1940, shortly before he blew his own brains out:

"The game of speculation is the most uniformly fascinating game in the world. But it is not a game for the stupid, the mentally lazy, the man of inferior emotional balance, or for the get-rich-quick adventurer. They will die poor."

This reminds me. If you (Mega) haven't read Reminiscences (or haven't read it in a while) get it out and study it. The answers to 90% of your trading problems are in there.
 
This reminds me. If you (Mega) haven't read Reminiscences (or haven't read it in a while) get it out and study it. The answers to 90% of your trading problems are in there.


Get that book out indeed. Megsy needs to come up with a simplistic entry rule, reduce it to one price, it's either on or off, 1/0. Market shades of grey do not sit well in peoples minds.
 
Wow. Where to start?!!!

First of all, I just want to say thank you to everyone who has taken the time to reply. Every reply has been brilliant, thoughtful and honest and I am very grateful to you all.

I guess I was just having a bad few days... We all get that from time to time right? For me, it helps to open up to people about my problems and listen to sound and logical advice from people who are in a more rational state of mind. I also don't like to bottle things/emotions up. I have to tell people. Normally I'd tell a friend or colleague or family member. This time I chose T2W and I'm glad I did. I just hope I don't come across as a big moaner! The vast majority of my posts are lulzy with a few trading questions in between so I hope I haven't damaged my "On screen persona" too badly!

As for the panic attacks. In reality, I've come a long way. Working in the pub, although I dislike it, has definitely helped me become more confident. The only situations I really get them now (or would get them) are - going out for meals, interviews, driving test, and sometimes travelling. The meal thing is because the main symptom I get is wanting to be sick, which is quite a problem when trying to eat. However, I am getting better and there are a few places I can go with my girlfriend and I'm ok, so that is good. Interviews, I'm avoiding by 1. Staying in my current job. 2. By trying to make it as a trader and 3. By aiming to start my own carpet cleaning business. After all, I think I'd rather work for myself and by myself anyway. Or maybe with a few close people. Travelling I am getting better, its only the train really and the last few times I have been fine. It's just after my worst ever panic attack on a train where I lost consciousness, it has made me terrified of flying as its not like I can get off if I need to. Strange because I actually love flying, but now, because I'm worried about it I know I'll have a panic attack. The thing with me is, I don't really worry about the events, I just worry about the panic attacks, so its a vicious circle. But I hope I'll be ok to fly as my girlfriend is originally from Thailand and I'd love to visit there one day with her. Then there is the biggie - The driving test. This is my main problem at the moment. Doing this would solve the interview thing, and give me a lot more freedom and independence. It is the thing I need to do most and the thing I am most scared of. So much so I've even discussed with a friend the possibility of me learning to drive and then paying him to do the test for me! Please don't judge me, I'm not actually doing it, it was just an idea born from desperation! Plus, he'd literally do anything for money!

A few suggestions have been made to get professional help such as CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy). Well actually I already had this when I started getting the panic attacks at 16 and to be honest, for me this did more harm than good. The idea behind it is that you put yourself into the situations that cause you anxiety until the anxiety goes basically. At the time, I was frightened, really frightened and I felt alone and that nobody understood and that I was almost being bullied to do things I felt I couldn't do. It caused me a lot more worry and I started worrying about other things and situations and subsequently began to panic about them. Plus the whole counselling thing, constantly thinking/talking about my anxiety, associating with similar people and searching for advice from similar people, got me depressed. In short, I don't wanna do it again. I am making progress, albeit it very slow, but small steps and that. I guess I just worry that, I'm 26 (I know some of you will laugh about me worrying about my age - sorry!), 30 is not that far away, and by 30 I kind of want to be (and should be) financially stable and looking towards starting a family. Don't worry, I will make sure I am financially and mentally stable before having kids. I just can't wait for that day. By the way, although I don't fancy CBT, but I would be interested in hearing about any meditation or relaxation techniques any of you have any experience/knowledge of. Particularly relating to improving sleep as this is a major problem for me. I have racing thoughts and my inner voice doesn't shut up at night!

Beta blockers - A few people mentioned these which funny as I've not long been prescribed some! I was suggested these many times a while back so I did some research and they sounded perfect for me. Ideally, I'd like not to have to take anything but now my mindset now is well, if there is something available that can help me I should use it. Basically, the don't stop the mentally anxiety, the worrying etc. But this was never really my big problem. My main issue was the physical symptoms - being sick/fainting/shaking etc. This is exactly what beta blockers do - they stop the flow of adrenalin which is what causes those symptoms. Then in addition if you have positive experience in certain situations because of not having the physical symptoms, the mental anxiety will reduce. So anyway, I went to see my doctor and he agreed that these would probably help me, and be better than anti-depressant and anti-anxiety drugs that you take all the time. You can just take these beta blockers as and when you need them which is good because I'm not always anxious. Anyway, I've tried them a couple of times to make sure I'm ok on them and to see if they work. On the train and going out for a big meal and I was fine. So next step.... Driving lesson!

Trading, I'll try not to put too much pressure on myself, just continue to do a little bit each day. I've had a couple of offers of help through PM which I'll pursue and see how it goes. In the meantime I'll keep doing my long term investments in shares and metals (Go Palladium!!!!). Not much more I can say on that matter really!!!

Vending.... Not sure if this suggestion was serious or not! Although I'll be honest, I have considered it!!! Ok, not teaching trading as that would be morally wrong. But I did have an idea to start a website reviewing EA's. That way I could maybe have affiliate links and the aim would be to build it up and get a following then maybe one day develop an EA with someone and sell it on there. Plus if there were any decent EA's I could then trade with them! Just an idea to keep my hand in and maybe make some beer money... Who knows, maybe an idea if the trading doesn't work out.

Anyway, hope I touched on everything there. Gotta dash, need to make my tea then off to work. Joy! Thanks again to all for the brilliant replies. Take care and have a good week.

Sam.
 
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