When does it stop hurting...

Doomberg

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...When you have a loss? My last 48 hours have been crazy, yesterday i gained +400 trading for 20 hours straight and just as i was about to clock off i took a trade, got stuck in it added to it massively (like a tool) and then was stopped out by 0.1 points and 5 seconds after it was stopped out whoooosh it went in my direction and i would of netted another large gain on top of my profits. Instead i lost all of the gain from the +400 as i'd increased my amounts of contracts like an idiot. I pretty much did the same today as well.

Anyway i'm not complaining about being stopped out by 0.1 points before it goes my way as i know it happens. After it happened i thought to myself "you know what? this doesn't even hurt any more because i know that this happens and am ready for these days" but still i woke up at 6am thinking and feeling in pain mentally, i just couldn't not think about it. I remember one time a while ago when i got stuck in a trade and took major risk of adding to it and it was that substantial to me that i was even running when going for a wee. In the end 30 hours later i was stopped and just turned my computer off, lay on the couch and held my cat tightly and said to her over and over again "why mogg, why" lol

So, when does it stop hurting when you mess up?
 
Well, you know what you did wrong. Unfortunately it's easy to do it again as you found out. Losing is never exciting even though it's a normal part of trading.

When I have a bad day and I review my my trades and find that I did all the right things according to my plans and methods, made the right calls, kept the losses at a minimum, proper analysis was done, but I still lost, then the pain is fleeting. It was just a day that wasn't meant to be, it happens, move on.

On the other hand if I see that I just compounded mistakes on top of one another, revenge traded, threw caution to the wind, or whatever else, then the pain stays for quite a while (usually because I keep banging my head against the wall!), but most likely because I know it didn't have to be that way. The pain stays until I've made back most of the losses properly. There's no question that these days happen too although VERY infrequent. After all we are human.

Peter
 
IS adding to losers part of your strategy? I'd guess not. If so, and you're doing it regularly, then you should also write off that gain of 400 as luck, because it's easy to gain lots by adding to losers until that one wrong one keeps going.

I imagine it hurts because you sabotaged yourself, or because you thought you were on to something successful but the loss made it clear that you weren't. It will stop hurting when you stop sabotaging, which may or may not ever happen.

Anyway, sounds like you're taking way too much risk.
 
My stop is in just as soon as I have made the trade and it's not big.
If you get stopped out, it is a good idea to watch it go further and then when it turns in your direction - back in and make a win out of a loss.
Throwing the computer at the wall won't help and shows you haven't got the possibility of a loss in your calculations to be turned into a bigger profit.
 
Throwing the computer at the wall won't help and shows you haven't got the possibility of a loss in your calculations to be turned into a bigger profit.

Me, in my early days. I don't know how it happened :whistling
 

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Started Indicies and EUR/USD early hours of monday morning and was still up the next morning having a field day until i made a mega mistake... oh well, i'll live

:cry::cheesy:

At this stage, trading is an obsession for you and not a way to make a living, right?
 
Hey, Doomberg.

How long have you been trading?

I also have had a pretty bad day, -60 points. Far too frequently I have stupid days when I have an urge to place a trade despite being far from sure on the outcome. I lose and then feel a desperate urge to win it back, increasing my losses.

I am learning but I really am realising now about how hard the pyscholgy part of this is to overcome.
 
At this stage, trading is an obsession for you and not a way to make a living, right?

Why would you use the word obsession? And no it's not my only income as i have businesses than need a lot of work. But i'm bored of the rest and eventually will be trading full time
 
Hey, Doomberg.

How long have you been trading?

I also have had a pretty bad day, -60 points. Far too frequently I have stupid days when I have an urge to place a trade despite being far from sure on the outcome. I lose and then feel a desperate urge to win it back, increasing my losses.

I am learning but I really am realising now about how hard the pyscholgy part of this is to overcome.

I've had a play with spread betting etc for a few years and lose. I've only took things seriously over the last year or so when i started to realize how much money can be made when you are good at it, and yes the psychology side of things is the hardest part i think
 
Doom you are a tit. Write yourself an email outlining every mistake you made and call yourself a stupid CNUT. Print the mail out and pin it to your desk where everybody can see it Especially YOU
 
Yeah the funny thing is, i make the most money when i rule break... but i also make the most losses when they happen, and when they come they come big.
 
I would agree with dionysus with the word obsession at the moment the market looks like a huge shiny casino where you can win big but you can also lose big

if you are breaking rules when you get big wins then human nature says break rules all the time this is totally the wrong approach you must stick to your rules

come to the market with the approach of a fledgling business, you will be open each day you will have good days and you will have bad days

it is better to have many small regular customers in the early years than the odd large one

whether its a good day or a bad day
the pain stops when you can walk away and think "thats me done for today"
 
I wouldn't go as far as using obsession, especially since i've not traded in 6 weeks due to being too busy. And RE it being a casino, trading if done properly is much better than any casino. The odds in a casino is 49% chance that you will win. Any good trader is way over that in my opinion
 
here is a really good tip; like, a proper really good tip:

when you are trading like that (obsessively/compulsivley)...







.....









STOP!





HA!



No, really, here is another REALLY good tip; when you are trading like that, talk to yourself out loud about what you are doing. like "I'm going to move my stop to give this more room to breathe, I'm still bullish" or "I'm gonna average in here, it was a buy up there so it's a buy down here too" or "I'm taking my 300th trade of the day because it only takes one to turn me green for the day - and you gotta be in it to win in". Say what you are actually doing, and soon enough you will realize you are pulling a Howard [being a plonker].
 
I wouldn't go as far as using obsession, especially since i've not traded in 6 weeks due to being too busy. And RE it being a casino, trading if done properly is much better than any casino. The odds in a casino is 49% chance that you will win. Any good trader is way over that in my opinion

ok maybe not obsession but I will go with tenacity what you see is trading is easily accomplished and straight forward an intelligent person should be able to get an edge that would prove successful
what is stopping you is emotion we all have it and many including myself have been in exactly the same position you are in, what brings you out the other side is being able to detach money from emotion damm hard thing to do.

ps I thought the odds were higher in a casino than that?
 
They say we feel the pain of a loss twice as much as we feel the pleasure of a gain !? Maybe this is what you are experiencing ? I fear for that cat if this carries on !

I also wonder whether the theoretical chance of us producing a winning trade without any kind of trading edge to increase those probabilities is actually 2/1 ie 1in 3 (33%) in that whilst there are only 2 trade outcomes - win or lose there are 3 scenarios we can experience in a trade, these are

1. Trade goes in wrong direction and hits our stop - a loss is realised - price continues against the direction of our trade.
2. Trade goes immediately/eventually in right direction without hitting our stop first, and a gain is realised (hits our limit order)
3. Trade initially goes in wrong direction -hits our stop but then continues in right direction - a loss is realised. (ie we were right but at the wrong time - which = being wrong and a loss.)



G/L
 
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