Joke of the day

This is a discussion on Joke of the day within the The Foyer forums, part of the Off the Grid category; I really didn’t know much about the stock market until becoming a senior in college. Here’s what happened. There was ...

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Old Oct 7, 2003, 2:12pm   #25
 
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I really didn’t know much about the stock market until becoming a senior in college. Here’s what happened.

There was this guy, Ed, in my dormitory the entire 4 years of college. He was the genius type with bad eyesight. He had these thick coke-bottle glasses and never went to class, but he always got A’s on every test. Instead of going to class, he just sat in his room and studied the stock market. He had stock charts all over the walls and even had a computer before you could even buy them in a store!

Upon reaching my senior year, I realized it was time to get serious about making a living, that I would need to go out and make some money. So I went down to talk to Ed.

"Ed," I said. "I’ll work as hard as I have to. Tell me how I can end up with one million dollars in the stock market." He scratched his head, then lowered his head and looked at me over the top of those thick glasses and said, "Start with $2 million."
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Old Oct 7, 2003, 10:10pm   #26
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A guy came in a bar for a drink and the robot asked him, "What's your IQ"?
The man replied, "130".
So the robot proceeded to make conversation about physics, astronomy, chemistry, philosophy, and so on.

The man listened intently and thought, "This is really cool".

Another guy came in for a drink and the robot asked him, "What's your IQ?"
The man responded, "100."
So the robot started talking about the football, baseball, cars, fixing the house, and so on.

The man thought to himself, "Wow, this is really cool".

A third guy came in to the bar. As with the others, the robot asked him, "What's your IQ?"
The man replied, "70".

The robot then said, "So, what's stocks are you buying these days?"
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Old Oct 7, 2003, 10:54pm   #27
 
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Very subtle, Dr. Lecter, having come from a binary backgound it has deep meaning. I was also bottle fed on Octal and Hex.
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The views expressed here are my personal views and for your information only. Any expression of likely movement of a share is merely guesswork and is to be treated as such.This information must NOT be used as a basis for making any investment decision.
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Old Oct 8, 2003, 8:57am   #28
 
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Well, where is this web site then, cos I'm bored...
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Old Oct 8, 2003, 9:52am   #29
 
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Well CM u just failed the first part of the test :-)

Perhaps the Doctors profile might hold a clue?
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Thanks! The following members like this post: wasp
Old Oct 8, 2003, 10:17am   #30
 
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Not even that.
Just rest your pointer on the doc's www button at the bottom of the post... as Mr C should know.
Must be all those ooioiiioioiiioioiooioiooioioiioiiiooioioiioooioioi iiooooi'S m8.

Oops, hope I didn't swear in a binary sort of way
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Old Oct 8, 2003, 10:20am   #31
 
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A physicist, a chemist, and an economist are shipwrecked on a desert island with only a can of beans to eat and no way to open it.

The physicist makes a suggestion: "I can calculate just the right angle, mass, and velocity of a projectile that will knock the top off the can."

"No!" the economist cries, "That might spill the beans." The chemist then says, "I can make a compound from some local plants that will eat through the tin and open the can." "Fool! That would contaminate the beans!" says the Economist.

Exasperated, the other two ask the economist if he has a plan. "Of course!" says the economist, "The solution is simple. First, we assume we have a can opener..."
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Old Oct 8, 2003, 10:22am   #32
 
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Huw, I only got 125 on the 'Ultimate IQ Test' and I need 126 to be able to join!
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