my journal 3

Yamato

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All right. Let's get started again. This time with a stricter filter (only posts from contacts):
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I'll keep writing the same things I wrote on my previous journals, "my journal" and "my journal 2". Go there if you need information about something I am referring to.

Done with my daily math exercises at khanacademy.org:
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Usual dose of daily math:
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This one below wasn't easy:
Functions 3 | Khan Academy

It takes focus on top of knowledge. I did almost 10 exercises right, then got one wrong, and it made me go back ten exercises again, then made one mistake again, and had to go back again... it's almost impossible to get a whole set right, because by the time you're at the last exercise you're exhausted. Also, you need to do them the other way around and start from the inner functions.

For a while, I am not going to watch new videos and embark on new topics, since I am just tackling the review exercises. This before finishing all the exercises.
 
Enjoyed that Functions question. Bit rusty.......Ironic as I am studying mathematical sciences at the minute. keep it going.
 
Yes, thanks for the feedback. Hopefully I'll get to a higher level one day (which will enable me to understand portfolio theory), but first I have to build solid foundations, and khan academy is really good at that, and at making you get in touch with math again, after school made you dislike it.
 
52 to go:

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Probably done for the day.
 
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Thanks. I had thought there were a few silent readers appreciating my journal. Thanks for letting me know.
 
Daily math done:

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They came up with 4 new exercises, so I've done many, but I still have 49 exercises to go. 80% of work done. After this, I will have very solid foundations (and what's most important, I will have confidence in my math skills), but still not enough to tackle portfolio theory. I have plenty of time in my hands anyway, since there's no capital in sight. And this is the best investment of my time.
 
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weekly update (forward-testing)

The (formerly) traded combination did not recover yet from the day we stopped trading it with real money (but it didn't go any lower either):
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The best systems at the moment are (trades made on the x, sharpe ratio on y, not shown those with trades less than 10 or sharpe ratio less than 2):
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No more caring about the rating of my journal. I used to be obsessed about this, but, just as I successfully got rid of the trolls (with the new option of "only posts from people on contact list"), I now must get rid of this worry, too. Indeed, this is the only way the idiots of the world can still affect me (as far as this journal).

So, given that I just got the first rating of 1 star, by some idiot, to offset this rating, I would have needed to register 10 times, and rate myself five stars. But that would be a way to cause myself worries endlessly for the future.

Instead, I rated my own journal one star, and used another nick (registered a long time ago, to give "my journal 2" five stars) to rate myself yet another "one-star". This way, I am contributing to my own low rating, and it's a psychological trick to not worry about it anymore.

Given that there are in the world a majority of idiots, I should not be surprised to get a low rating anyway. Actually, a low rating may even be a guarantee of my journal being good. I should be honoured to have a low rating.

My only concern from now on, as far as this journal, is to keep track of my work and my thoughts. I don't have to worry about the contacts, not about the ratings, and I am not even worried about unpleasant idiots popping up here without warning. This is going to be a pleasure. I can write whatever I want, show it to everyone, and yet not worry about anything.
 
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Ok, that's it for today, probably.

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I did 6 exercises, but since they added 3 new exercises, now I still have 43 to go. 83% of work done.



 
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Ok, probably done for the day. All the easy stuff was done, and now there's some really complex math ahead.

40 exercises to go, 84% of exercises done.

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world maps

world map - Google Search
If you think about it, that is one place where the americans left it how they found it, with europe at the center of the world. In many other fields, they made themselves the center, but they did not change the maps.

 
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thinking about restarting

My Melancholy Blues - Queen - YouTube

For a few reasons I will wait another month:

1) I want to keep learning to count the cents of all daily expenses, and saving, as I've been doing.

2) I might get a donation from my parents for christmas or similar.

3) I will get the usual extra salary for the end of the year (from my job, normal here in italy).

4) I might find some investor

5) I might benefit from some more math


But after a month, in January, I will be able to resume trading on my own, with a few systems. I don't know if I'll do it, but let's consider the candidate systems anyway:

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By looking at my scatter plot, I have identified 4 of them, which have a low margin and drawdown, and a high sharpe ratio:

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Margin-wise, I'd just need 2000. Drawdown-wise I'd need 5000 to be safe. Those 2000 I'd have right now, but I can't start with just that. I'd need the 5000, and for those, I am regretting the hundreds of lunches/dinners I've had over the last few years. Now I know why everyone was so happy to let me pay for them. That's why I will benefit from some more time spent saving and counting cents. If I can get as far as coming back home on the subway, it will really show me that I've learned the value of money. I hope one day I will not go back to wasting money after learning how precious money is.

All things considered, by coming back on the subway, I would save 220 euros per month. It's not a lot, but it cannot be ignored. And if I don't at least get myself to do that, I will not have the proof that I have learned the value of money, and without that, money management is at risk, because its first requirement is the desire to not lose money. The question to myself is this: how much do i really want to succeed? Do I really care or am I just happy with a regular life? And how much sacrifices am I willing to make to achieve it? Or do I just want to achieve it with intellectual work and no material effort? I might need material effort and learn the value of money.

You know, I often think of robbing a bank, but taking the subway to save a few hundreds never crosses my mind. I admit it might be because I am spoiled. It's easier to fantasize about this than making it happen overnight, which could actually be the case. In the same way I don't fancy walking into interviews or asking anyone for help. All my life my father has made things happen for me (got me jobs, etc.) and he has gotten me used to seeing things happen, without efforts.

Anyway, I will not have 5000 in January (unless I get some money from my parents). And since I don't want to get another loan, nor trade just one system, because it'd be too boring, then I won't resume trading in January. It would be unsafe otherwise.

I wish I could invest in mini-mini-futures, with commissions and spread costs being mini-mini-commissions and mini-mini-spread costs. But it cannot be done. If it could be done I'd invest in... but then I'd really have to figure out the portfolio theory I'm ignoring. Starting small allows me to start without having to worry about portfolio theory, because you can't really do any combinations if you're trading just 4 systems. You either trade them or you don't.

Anyway, I am paying for past mistakes, both with trading and spending money every day on unnecessary things. Let's focus on the future and what I can still do right. I could not find any extra sources of income, and resuming full-time is not a good idea, because the salary doesn't increase by much, and my free time is more important.

All I can focus on right now is doing math, which is like producing capital in my head. And also I can focus on not spending the little money I make. The day I'll take the subway home for one month, it will be a humiliation, but I will also be one step closer to being successful. All it takes is walking down into the subway. I need to learn to count the cents.
 
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